rant

i keep telling people that I want to make friends with them and then I never talk to them and I don’t really know why. I think maybe a part of it is that these days I’m just kind of sick of doing everything on the internet. I guess i kind of always have been. I don’t WANT to text my friends I want to hang out with them in-person. I love having guests over, or even just meeting people at the park. But like I have no motivation to text people and therefore I never get to the stage where we’re doing in-person stuff. Plus I just have so much anxiety about talking to people, so i never text them even if I really want to. That’s probably the bigger issue honestly. But like I don’t experience that anxiety as much in-person

Ive been in a rough mental state this past week because of my lack of social interaction (and probably hormonal changes). I’m feeling better now but like I don’t know how to solve this problem. It didn’t bother me when I was in school and I saw my friends five days a week, but now its like I don’t know how to make friends without either: going somewhere public I might get harassed out of, or trying to meet people online and getting anxious about everything.